If you need a good laugh, check out the test answers shown in the link below. You’ve probably seen it before, but I came across it the other day it gave me a chuckle:

Funny Test Answers

Maybe we should adapt this for the office?

Ah Wednesday. Possibly the worst day of the week, as I’ve previously documented in this article: Think Mondays are Bad? Wednesdays are Worse. In keeping with this train of thought, here’s a little something to brighten up your day:

Creepy bathroom hand soap

Let’s just say if I saw this in the bathroom, I might just take my chances with the water.

Happy Wednesday!

I came across this humorous resume on Reddit, and I thought it was a good Friday laugh for everybody. I especially like the reference to the Excel spreadsheets, as that is so damn true sometimes.

Happy Friday!

Here’s a little car wash humor to cap off your Sunday (at my expense of course):

We had just gotten back from a ski trip in North Carolina, and our car was pretty filthy. Of course, my wife couldn’t leave the car in this condition for more than 30 seconds, let alone the next day, so on the way back we stopped at an auto-wash near our apartment. It’s also worthwhile to note two things here:

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The breakroom is the social center of the office. Some of the most important things in the office reside there, such as: the microwave, the refrigerator, the snack machine, the TV, and the soda machine to name a few. However, because of this, there is one serious downside: The smells. Yes, most of us are familiar with the various awful smells that can inhabit the breakroom, but which ones are the worst? Here are my top five:

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In the bathroom as we’re both “hard at work”….

Random work guy: “Hey, how’s it going?”
Me: “…..good…”
Random work guy: “Yeah, so, what a day, huh? Pretty busy.”
Me: “…yeah…”
Random work guy: “So what are you doing this weekend?”
Me: *sigh*

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Nope, I’m not talking about the movie here. Instead, I’d like to pose a question: Why would a host or hostess EVER seat customers next to a table with a crying baby when the restaurant was empty? Does this make any sense? I ask this because it happened to me last night.

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Out of all the things that could happen when you’re walking home from work, what do you think is the LEAST likely out of this list:

1. Dog attack
2. Splashed by a car
3. Bird crapping on your head

Oh wait, is one of those choices HIGHLIGHTED? Yes, that’s right, highlighted. Why? Because it is so improbable that it is the obvious choice. Do you see where I’m going with this? Let me spell it out for those who missed it:

Walking home from work today, a bird crapped on my head

I’ll set the scene: I’m walking home from work, enjoying the nice day outside. It’s about a 15 minute walk from my work to my apartment, so it’s not too bad. I’d also like to point out that I usually snag a ride from my fiancé to and from work (feel free to boo me at this point, but it’s on her way =) ).

Anyways, I’m strolling along like a sucker, about five minutes into my walk, when IT happens. Now, it’s important to realize that when you get crapped on by a bird, you may not realize it immediately. It can almost feel like a drop of water hit you. The last thing you think just happen is that you got crapped on. What are the chances I ask you?

Back to the story, I get this feeling and the first thing I do is reach my hand up and see what’s going on. To my horror, it comes back wet and slimy. Oh yes, wet and slimy. Stunned, I keep walking. It slowly dawns on me what actually happened. If this has never happened to you, it’s pretty hard to describe how disgusting it feels. You’ll just have to take my word for it. Here’s the worst part: I work right outside of Washington DC, in a busy little town called Arlington. What does this mean? It means there were more than enough people to witness this happen. Even better, I still had a good 10 minute walk ahead of me.

When something like this happens, it feels like everybody is looking at you, even if they aren’t. Old ladies, babies, cab drivers, it felt like everybody knew of my misfortune. Waiting at a crosswalk became unbearable. I’m pretty sure that I’ve never made it home faster than I did today. Needless to say, I washed myself as quickly as possible.

Do you want to know what the worst part is (nope, haven’t gotten to it yet)? The worst part is that this is not the first time I’ve had this happen to me. When I was about 12, I was helping my dad work a sidewalk sale at our store and as I’m ringing up a satisfied customer, the same thing happened. Here’s my theory: I think that the birds decided to lay low for a while, just to throw me off my guard. Then, when I least expect it, they strike with the quickness. What’s the solution? Obviously, I’m not going to divulge it on the Internet, as the sly bastards have spies everywhere. However, I will give you one hint: It involves a hat.